Friday, September 04, 2009
stuck between my fantasy and what is real
Is it possible to forget how to like someone? To have a crush on someone? To love someone?
These feelings feel so foreign right now.
I don't even remember the last time I had crush on anyone or have any possible form of liking, and I'm talking about a real person, someone I can see in my life and talk to (if fate permits it), not all the Korean boys I go crazy for. I mean the feelings' different you know. You know you can never get those boys, the closest you can get is the updates on their life, a million and one photos, a peek at where they stay/sleep, videos on them. At least you somewhat know about them - their life, age, personality, weight height, family you know those kinda stuff. & you're pretty much contented with that. Well of course I won't deny there are times you want more, say you want them in your life but obviously that's not gonna happen. So, what's left for you to do is simply fantasize fantasize fantasize.
What saddens me is now is that the only thing I'll know about his is his name, just his name. I'm afraid two years will pass and his name is all I'll ever know. That's all and nothing else. Not his age, where he was from, whatever information that can be easily gotten if he was an idol.
THIS IS PLAIN STUPID.
These feelings feel so foreign right now.
I don't even remember the last time I had crush on anyone or have any possible form of liking, and I'm talking about a real person, someone I can see in my life and talk to (if fate permits it), not all the Korean boys I go crazy for. I mean the feelings' different you know. You know you can never get those boys, the closest you can get is the updates on their life, a million and one photos, a peek at where they stay/sleep, videos on them. At least you somewhat know about them - their life, age, personality, weight height, family you know those kinda stuff. & you're pretty much contented with that. Well of course I won't deny there are times you want more, say you want them in your life but obviously that's not gonna happen. So, what's left for you to do is simply fantasize fantasize fantasize.
THIS IS PLAIN STUPID.
I got a problem and I, don't know what to do about it,
Even if I did, I don't know if I would quit but I DOUBT IT.
I'm taken by the thought of it.
& i know this much is trueee,
Babyyy you have become my addiction.
I'm so strung out on you.
I can barely move,
but i like it.
(i can never get enough of you, my sweetest drug)
so in the end, all i do is just stare. stare at your beautiful face.
& how much you remind me of him.
or maybe it's just me being obsessed with him.
but i see some parts of him in you.
okay maybe I'm imagining things.
but the hair, the ear stud,
and the way you look so dammmnn good.
this is pointless really.
i just know it.
just like this,
well almost.
okay fiiine, maybe just a little.
Even if I did, I don't know if I would quit but I DOUBT IT.
I'm taken by the thought of it.
& i know this much is trueee,
Babyyy you have become my addiction.
I'm so strung out on you.
I can barely move,
but i like it.
(i can never get enough of you, my sweetest drug)
so in the end, all i do is just stare. stare at your beautiful face.
& how much you remind me of him.
or maybe it's just me being obsessed with him.
but i see some parts of him in you.
okay maybe I'm imagining things.
but the hair, the ear stud,
and the way you look so dammmnn good.
this is pointless really.
i just know it.
just like this,well almost.
okay fiiine, maybe just a little.