Sunday, January 20, 2008
fading away.
PEOPLE ALWAYS LEAVE.
if self mutilation could solve all problems, i'll slit my wrists till i black-out.
& perhaps i would be a happier girl.
okay fuck, im falling into depression mode. just like before, and i'm trying my best not to fall back to that. cos i wont be able to find myself again. when my esteem was way down below.
where everyone seems to be smarter than me
prettier than me.
better than me.
everything, just not as thrashy as me.
SELF-DESTRUCTION.
Anyways, it was kak ina's wedding last saturday. Truthfully, i didn't really like the decor of pink and green together. Maybe on clothes wouldn't be so bad but decor, looks weird la. But i like the dais and wedding cake - which was layers of CUPCAKES(: cupcakes are so delicious. & the hantaran got maggi? like WTF??!! Super weird. Ohh, the groom is pretty comical. & her dresses were pretty with a tiara.
Okay so, three projects down, TWO more to go. That excludes comm skills and fashion of which i have not asked cik fadilah to draw. Stress la. I feel like chopping off my hair. Haha. I actually dreamt i used a shaver to cut it off till it was at my ear. SUPER SHORT! Apparently, i dreamt he had a lamborghini and i wanted to take a ride on it. He made me go through so many obstacles and i failed all cos he manipulated all my weakness. But at least in the end,we got together (happy ending) unlike in real life. SO moral of story : DREAMING IS NEXT TO REALITY.
faz you're so delusional.
someone told me to move on cos i'm just wasting my time. people do crazy things when they're in love. but i guess if you love someone, it means wanting the person to be happy. so if leaving you alone and making you feel "never better" is what constitutes HAPPY for you then i should start walking off?
slowly fading away.
& somehow leona lewis//bleeding love describes eveything.
if self mutilation could solve all problems, i'll slit my wrists till i black-out.
& perhaps i would be a happier girl.
okay fuck, im falling into depression mode. just like before, and i'm trying my best not to fall back to that. cos i wont be able to find myself again. when my esteem was way down below.
where everyone seems to be smarter than me
prettier than me.
better than me.
everything, just not as thrashy as me.
SELF-DESTRUCTION.
Anyways, it was kak ina's wedding last saturday. Truthfully, i didn't really like the decor of pink and green together. Maybe on clothes wouldn't be so bad but decor, looks weird la. But i like the dais and wedding cake - which was layers of CUPCAKES(: cupcakes are so delicious. & the hantaran got maggi? like WTF??!! Super weird. Ohh, the groom is pretty comical. & her dresses were pretty with a tiara.
Okay so, three projects down, TWO more to go. That excludes comm skills and fashion of which i have not asked cik fadilah to draw. Stress la. I feel like chopping off my hair. Haha. I actually dreamt i used a shaver to cut it off till it was at my ear. SUPER SHORT! Apparently, i dreamt he had a lamborghini and i wanted to take a ride on it. He made me go through so many obstacles and i failed all cos he manipulated all my weakness. But at least in the end,we got together (happy ending) unlike in real life. SO moral of story : DREAMING IS NEXT TO REALITY.
faz you're so delusional.
someone told me to move on cos i'm just wasting my time. people do crazy things when they're in love. but i guess if you love someone, it means wanting the person to be happy. so if leaving you alone and making you feel "never better" is what constitutes HAPPY for you then i should start walking off?
slowly fading away.
& somehow leona lewis//bleeding love describes eveything.
I don’t care what they say
I’m in love with you
They try to pull me away, but they don’t know the truth
My heart’s crippled by the vein that I keep on closing
You cut me open and I keep bleeding.